How do you break up with someone you really love?

I love my BF, I wish we could be friends. We've been together for 4 years and it happened the day I met him. He was my very first boyfriend and I learned a lot about love and relationships with him. I don't think he has though. I feel like he's still stuck in the ';high school'; dating scene. Like, ';oh you're cute. Wanna be my GF?'; We are not compatible at all.





All he likes is cars and can't seem to carry on a conversation about anything else....maybe but rarely. Annnnd he's gone all the time, working out of town.I really do love him and would hate to see him hurting, especially be the cause of it but I also feel like I can't keep hanging around him because of all our history.





He thinks I am ';the one'; but I've fallen out of love with him. We are both 22 and I'm just now coming out of my shell and discovering the world and he doesn't seem to like who I'm becoming. He lacks motivation. He isn't actively trying to better himself and is employed by his father. That is his world and he is happy in it: drinking and cars.





Now that I'm going out and meeting people, he is so clingy it is annoying. Before I'd have to beg him to come home from work but now every night he's home and wants to be with all the time. I tell him ';I'm cleaning'; and he says ';I'll just come over and hang out'; I don't under this.





I have told him all of these things. We have had multiple conversations. It all ended one day a little less than a year ago when he left me in a Uhaul, which I tried to not hold against him but I was alone in an apartment, with no job and I woke up to him packing his things.





About a month later he wanted to take me to Discovery Cove because I've always dreamed of swimming with dolphins and so we thought we'd try to work things out then.





Things aren't working. He doesn't see it. I found a whole world full of interesting and exciting people who can talk about something more than a motor and I can't spend the rest of my life with him. I don't want his gifts.





What should I do? I want to be friends but I just don't think that's working and I said he could ask me out on dates whenever. I still love him, maybe one day he'll grow up and the date will be fun(?) but Im sooo tired of being unhappy.





How can I make him see this-that I'm not interested anymore. I can't change him, he has to change himself. He can't change me either.





All I wanted was a happy ending. Help?How do you break up with someone you really love?
well in reality you can't have your cake and eat it to. yea it would make you happy to break up and be friends, but if he still cares for you in a way that makes him want to be with you, it's not really fair for you to be ';in reach but out of reach';, you see what i'm saying? if you feel this way, don't beat around the bush GET IT OVER WITH, you are hurting him more by staying in a relationship that you aren't putting your all in. After the break up let time go by and maybe later down the road, you can strike a friendship with him. but for now it would be better for both of you to keep your distance. It also wouldn't be fair to your nxt bf for you to be bff with your ex.How do you break up with someone you really love?
wow thats a lot of reading......well u can have a coversation with him one day and ask him if u guys would still be friends if u to broke up....if he says that ur asking cuz u want to brake up then tell him the trueth that u do and tell him why.....dont cry while u tell him that or he'll think that he can win u back(like in a couple of days).....so be brave and just tell him.
Tell him just that. And sometimes u have 2 do things to people just to get the messege across. Get someone u love and show him u don't want to date or love anymore. It's okay if ur not friends and he get's pissed off and stuff. U'll find other friends. U did good askin' 4 help by the way. God Bless U. Hit me up at rashadlove77@yahoo.com 4 anything else. Tell ur friends. Maybe we could all be friends.
ya thats way to long to read. You say ';you know that guy from the coffee shop?'; ';he puts it in my butt';.
I know breaking up is really really hard but if things aren't working you can't stay in the relationship. I know you would like to remain friends with him but sometimes that just can't happen. Let him down easy. No one wants to be dumped but its a natural thing. You both will move on to new people. Good Luck! I hope i helped!